Monday, March 26, 2012

come out and unbind...finally it is time


yesterday i was installed
as pastor again..
no longer
an interim,
no more in the land
of temporary!

yesterday the preacher,
elsie armstrong rhodes,
blew the roof off the church.

telling the lazarus story
she yelled,
"come out!
unbind him."

and that is what has happened in my life.
i've come out!

at the loving words
and hands
and hearts
of family,
friends
and church members... 
the shame and fear in my life
has been unbound.

though parts of me were sealed like a tomb
i was blessed beyond measure
all along the way.

my beautiful former spouse,
my friend and soul mate,
who i share the deepest blessing of life..
the birth of our son and daughter.

my parents who have always loved without condition,
my brother who showed me courage,
my sister who showed me strength.

my friends
so many,
so very many....
(and you know who you are)

and church members
in various states.

all of you
stood at the tomb with me
and as i found courage enough
to roll away the stone

you stayed right by my side...
whispering, singing, praying,
listening, crying, hugging,
laughing, talking, and nudging.

you helped me to claim
what i denied far too long.

i am a gay
child of god
blessed, gifted and called.


being gay is not
my choice
or agenda...
it is my being...
it is who i am.

it was my choice to deny
who i am.

i know the judgment
and the walls some
have and will continue to build.

i know the courage it takes to dig down deep
in life and face what i was so afraid to face...

i know the hell of feeling lost
and cut off and without a future...
so filled with grief
i could hardly breathe.

most importantly
i know the healing
that comes with GOD'S grace. 

like lazarus
i have another chance to live.

like lazarus
i will forever be thankful
for all those who helped
to lovingly unbind me.

like lazarus
i will not chose to
bind myself
in the death of
fear or shame
ever again.

come out!
unbind!
breathe
new life.

4 comments:

Reverend Shawn said...

L'chaim!!!
To life!!!
Blake I rejoice with tears of joy in my eyes for the Resurrection you are experiencing!!!!
Keep Laughing!!

Rev Audrey Brown said...

I have been following your blog for years, and rejoice with you today.

Thank you for being the blessing you are

Reverend Shawn said...

Blake, I still remember the day you sent me a text revealing your self discovery ... my response at the time was 'AND?'.

Today the answer to that query has been wonderfully revealed and is being not only embraced, but celebrated!!!

Today the Prairie Preacher is rejoicing at the faith witness borne by the Laughing Pastor and brother, the world is a better place becasue of you !!!

Once again today I say AMEN !!!!

Val P. said...

Blake - I have been honored and blessed to receive your thoughts and words thru your blog. Your kind spirit is like a warm sun, I come here often to bask in it. You have been such a comfort to me in my recent time of sorrow. I am so happy that you are in such a wonderful place, both physically and spiritually. They are darn lucky to have you!