another pause for clarification

you don't get anywhere with anger

my mom reminded me today

and she is correct in many ways

and i've learned 

the lesson she speaks 

more than once.

however, 

it is important to acknowledge anger

and to know where it comes from

and to know how to feel it

and to know how to talk about it

and to know how to live through it.

and to understand how anger 

can serve as the path to deeper living. 

this

is what i am trying to do 

in this space.

i plan to share a lot of my story...

but as any story goes

one must start from the beginning.

as my story progresses 

i pray you also encounter the 

freedom, happiness and love 

that i have discovered

in this coming out process.

today i pause to share 

what i've been experiencing 

as i have been remembering 

and telling my story.

i did not expect the emotion 

of past stories to grab hold of me...

but it has.

remembering does involve 

on some level

re-living.  

i did not expect the re-living 

of some of these life episodes 

to open the way for insight...

but this is what has happened as well. 

i suppose this is why i blog.

it takes courage to remember and re-live

and glean insight.

i'm determined to have 

courage and 

i'm determined to make this 

journey in full...

this journey GOD has called me to take.

face your truth.

this is my calling...

and in so doing

i am discovering the value and purpose

of my life. 

face your truth.

this is my calling...

and in so doing

i open myself to others more deeply

and learn the value and purpose 

of their lives.

coming out...

coming to terms with 

and telling others 

i am gay

is the truth i have been facing 

these last four years

and facing truth

involves every emotion

of which anger is one.

we prefer to avoid anger

and pretend it is not part of our lives...

and you would think that on a blog

named laughing

anger would play a 

minor role...

but the truth i have 

encountered is

the more in tune i am 

to the presence of anger in life...

the less power anger has

a hold on my life

and the less power anger has 

in my life...

the more delicious 

the gift of laughter becomes:

the healing snorts

and joy filled gasps

and comforting ripples of giggles.

so yes, 

anger is here

it is a reality

but so too 

is the reality of life beyond anger.

i hope to express 

both sides of my life experience.